There was an old woman

Let me tell you a story

There was an old woman who was absolutely sick to death of being treated like a nice, old lady.

She was tired of careful hands under her elbows, helping her across the street.

She was sick of wearing Osti dresses with synthetic cardigans buttoned all the way up to the neck.

She was fed up with playing lawn bowls dressed in white.

She was really tired of morning teas with the Ladies Auxiliary.

The old woman decided that it was time for a change.

To signify this change she bought her very first pair of multi-coloured leggings. A range of wildly clashing shirts, a pair of boots and had a very very short hair cut.

Now they treated her as though she was a slightly mad, nice old lady.

This was not improvement enough. The old woman decided that drastic action had to be taken.

So she ran away and joined the circus.

In the circus she learned how to be part of an human pyramid.

She learned to swing on a trapeze, juggle fire and turn summersaults.

When she returned home they no longer treated her like a nice old lady. Oh no!

Now they treated her as a complete lunatic.

This was a decided improvement.

For not only did they respect her, they also feared her a little bit. They were no longer certain when she would begin to juggle fire or turn summersaults and they were frightened that she may not know when to stop!

That is the end of the story.

© CLHarper 2000